Armchair Quarterback

03/24/23

We live in a time where everyone appears to deem themselves as an expert, where few people actually have the qualifications or expertise on the topic.

Sports is one of the areas we see this happen the most. For example, think of all the fans of professional sports teams who have never played sports, but are extremely vocal about what they believe the winning formula is to succeed. Brené Brown refers to these opinions as “cheap seats”, because these voices are coming from people who aren’t actually in the arena themselves. 

As fans we even go as far to claim pseudo ownership by saying things like “my team”. It’s silly when you stop to think about it, but I think it paints an important picture of how more so now than ever armchair quarterbacks are infiltrating sports. 

The armchair quarterback can occur at all levels in sports from youth to professional, but maybe has the potential to have the most consequences at the youth level. Many parents tend to become the armchair quarterback to their child. While this is not automatically problematic, it’s something that needs to be monitored. 

A parent who’s an armchair quarterback to their child at its best can be inspiring and motivating, but at its worst could lead to burnout or them quitting sports all together. 

Youth athletes are more susceptible to harmful armchair quarterbacks due to their inexperience, increased vulnerability due to being younger, and exposure. As an athlete gets older and progresses in their sport they gain more confidence, autonomy, and experience. 

Unlike professional athletes, youth athletes don’t always get a choice to set boundaries or block out the noise of an armchair quarterback (especially a parent). A professional athlete has the ability to block a negative fan on twitter who critiques them. Youth athletes don’t have that same freedom, especially if that voice comes from the person sitting across from them at the dinner table every day.

It’s important that youth athletes have enough positive voices to remind them their value is not tied to their sport performance. If that encouraging voice is missing, it can lead to an athlete having poor self-esteem, burnout, depression, and anxiety. 

So whether you’re the overbearing armchair quarterback or not, I think it’s important all parents pause to self-evaluate. Ask yourself what the healthiest version of this role could look like? Are you being respectful, supportive, and encouraging to your child? 

If you’re not sure, ask your child directly. More specifically ask them how you can be more supportive to them as an athlete? Remember, your child is a person who also just happens to be an athlete.